A 13-minute film on the inner voice in recovery

Modest@m0dest___

< the voice >

this work was made on request from someone specifically to show their gratitude for someone else. for their friendship. for their tireless efforts. for their trust. for the help they provide to more people than i can count.

no rules. no guidance. just a symbol. a month ago - i had no idea where this would end up - but here we are.

if you have been or know someone in recovery you know < the voice >. the one in your head that won't shut up. am i enough. do i have enough. i want to break. why am i so alone. it never goes away. what changes is the ground it stands on.

so i wrote it down. six passages of that voice at six stages of coming through. noise. nagging. just words on paper. then i made a film for each one from dozens of scribbles, photos, clips. then when the words were down - i put words to song in six original pieces of music, one per passage, melodies on keyboard, synth and guitar, finished in suno. then i built a piece of software that pulls the films through the words themselves, white toner on black paper, decaying by wrong blocks, so you catch the passages but never quite read them. i tried to come up with something that looks how the voice feels.

the whole thing is one self-contained html file. a 1/1 that is also a 13 minute film in six chapters.

i've been asked to make a lot of things. i've never been asked to make something like this, at this scale, about something this close, for someone this close. i was humbled by the ask and i'm still a little wrecked from the making.

site, passages, process and music are at the link. press watch the full film and give it the thirteen minutes.

thank you to @AdamWeitsman and @Dannyb0yyy_ for trusting me with this. 4.22.17 - proud of you danny 🖤

[ entire 13 minute film is below - lenk in next post to read about the work ]

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